I asked a rock, “What does a day mean to you?” He replied,”A day to me is but the blink of an eye to you.”
Assume you are the rock. Your life span is millions of years. You spend your eons lying around while events unfold around you. You might be a lucky rock and happen to be in the right spot to witness Paul Revere ride by proclaiming, “The British are coming!” This may be the one and only event you witness over your entire life span. You are a special rock.
Now assume that you are a rock in a desert and you happen to be next to another rock. Your conversation might be, “Hey rock do you think it’s going to rain this century?” the other rock responds, “Probably.” That’s it, no more discussion for a thousand years. But this doesn’t matter because your life span is millions.
Now assume that you are human. Today the average life span of a U.S. citizen is 78.3 years. This is not very long compared to a rock. As people we spend our time in many pursuits. First we develop the capacity to learn from birth to 5 years old. Then we spend the next 13 to 21 years studying to become an expert with a marketable skill in whatever it is that interests us most. The next 52.3 years is filled with marriage(s), children, grandchildren, work accomplishments, any other endeavor that we choose and finally death.
Recently I found out that someone close to me was told by his doctor that they had a very limited time left to live, 2 months plus or minus. Along with the prognosis they were told they could no longer drive, they could no longer work and they should begin going through all the myriad of things to prepare for death. No healthy person can put themselves in the shoes of a person that is dying. But what we can do is try to understand and find the compassion to respect that their time is so very limited. People in this situation rely on family, friends, healthcare providers and anyone else to help them perform normally simple tasks. “I want to go to the store.” You cannot drive therefore someone has to take you. The person providing the ride says they can do it in an hour. The hour becomes 2 because of personal priorities. Now put yourself in the shoes of the dying person. The trip to the store may not seem important to you but now they have squandered 2 hours of a life that is so finitely defined and limited.
We spend the first parts of our lives concerned only with ourselves, like the 2 year old that stands in front of the TV totally oblivious to the people behind them that now cannot see the TV. Then the next part is spent putting the needs of our spouses and children first. When it comes to the dying how hard would it be, for a very short while, to put all of their needs first any time of the day or night. What does it say to our children, friends and acquaintances when we put the needs of someone who is so totally dependent on our help at the very bottom of our priority list? Watching someone we care about die is hard. As a dying person being made to wait or being ignored by the people they depend on is harder.
How valuable is a year, a day, an hour, a minute or a second?
